Sunday, September 30, 2007

Clerkship Freak out

So, today I had my first clerkship freak out. I'm not sure how I've held on this long without having one, but anyways, today was the first. There's a big meeting that is held in the fall of our clerkship year during which we decide where everyone is going for their rotations, and which specialties people will be doing during medicine specialties and surgical specialties. I AM GOING TO BE AT A CONFERENCE IN ANOTHER PROVINCE THE DAY THAT HAS BEEN ANNOUNCED FOR THE MEETING. I. AM. FREAKING. OUT.

This basically means that I'm going to have no say whatsoever about where I go and what I do and I've really been looking forward to this meeting because I have some very specific ideas about where I want to be. I know that I want to do my obstetrics and surgery in a smaller regional hospital. I hope to god to get clinics instead of wards for at least one of my medicine subspecialties. I want to do urology instead of ortho. And, guess what, none of this is probably going to happen. Yes, I can get a friend to try and advocate for me at the meeting, but when it comes down to it the person who isn't there usually gets the things that nobody wants.

Why the hell didn't they give us this date earlier. I've been signed up to present at this conference since the summer. I have a plane ticket and can't back out now. I had a crying breakdown and thankfully my roommate was able to talk me down off the window ledge, but I'm still very freaked out. This is the next 1.5 years of my life we're talking about - the remainder of my medical training. I want it to be the best that it can be. Does anyone want to go to this meeting as my representative?


Amy said...

When's the meeting? My only demand is that we get a chance to at least cross paths at the airport so I can see you.

Midwife with a Knife said...

Um... that sucks. There's nothing you can work out with the curriculum office (or whoever) at the school?

If the meeting's in Ontario, I might almost be able to help (I don't live in Ontario, but on a clear day I can see it from the hospital).

Xavier Emmanuelle said...

That sucks K! You can't talk to the person in charge and explain the situation? I'm only two hours away, when's the meeting?

Milk & Two Sugars said...

All my sympathy - that's a horrible situation to be in. But it seems you do have friends who're close enough to help. :)

Harry said...

oh that sucks medstudentitis, royally. For some reason admin here always manages to cock up whatever they are doing - especially during enrolment.